Why is it that Mom’s always seem to “compete” for the “prize” of Best Mom???

There is so much judgement, so much criticism. It’s disgusting.

Have you seen this little diddy, floating around the interwebs? Wish I could credit the author, but I just copy/pasted from Facebook…

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To the mom who’s breastfeeding: Way to go! It really is an amazing gift to give your baby, for any amount of time that you can manage! You’re a good mom.

To the mom who’s formula feeding: Isn’t science amazing? To think there was a time when a baby with a mother who couldn’t produce enough would suffer, but now? Better living through chemistry! You’re a good mom.

To the cloth diapering mom: Fluffy bums are the cutest, and so friendly on the bank account. You’re a good mom.

To the disposable diapering mom: Damn those things hold a lot, and it’s excellent to not worry about leakage and laundry! You’re a good mom.

To the mom who stays home: I can imagine it isn’t easy doing what you do, but to spend those precious years with your babies must be amazing. You’re a good mom.

To the mom who works: It’s wonderful that you’re sticking to your career, you’re a positive role model for your children in so many ways, it’s fantastic. You’re a good mom.

To the mom who had to feed her kids from the drive thru all week because you’re too worn out to cook or go grocery shopping: You’re feeding your kids, and hey, I bet they aren’t complaining! Sometimes sanity can indeed be found in a red box with a big yellow M on it. You’re a good mom.

To the mom who gave her kids a homecooked breakfast lunch and dinner for the past week: Excellent! Good nutrition is important, and they’re learning to enjoy healthy foods at an early age, a boon for the rest of their lives. You’re a good mom.

To the mom with the kids who are sitting quietly and using their manners in the fancy restaurant: Kudos, it takes a lot to maintain order with children in a place where they can’t run around. You’re a good mom.

To the mom with the toddler having a meltdown in the cereal aisle: they always seem to pick the most embarrassing places to lose their minds don’t they? We’ve all been through it. You’re a good mom.

To the moms who judge other moms for ANY of the above? Glass houses, friend. Glass houses.

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I love this – I just wish everyone had this mentality!

And recently, I came across this article, in which the author talks about feeling critiqued regardless of whether people are actually judging her or not. Basically, she says she feels judged even when other people are simply minding their own business. It’s a good read if you have spare time.

And it made me think how grateful I am for a trait that, until now, hasn’t been the best quality. For some reason…..I’m a little bit in my own world. Chris would tell you I’m 100% in my own world! And I don’t mean that I’m self-obsorbed or ego-centric or anything. It’s just…..I’m not very observant, to put it nicely. : )

I never notice when something changes – be it a friend’s hair style or the decor in my favorite restaurant. And my vision had been very poor  for a good while (I now have glasses, though!), so I kind of got used to just walking down the street without looking people in the faces because, even if I did, I literally couldn’t see them! This means I could pass right by a friend or colleague without saying “hi” because I didn’t even notice them! I know – totally in my own world!!!

I’ve discovered the “good” side of this when it comes to the Mommy Wars. Instead of constantly obsessing over how I’m doing and comparing myself to others, I just do my own thing. I’m not saying my way is “better,” and I certainly have times when I do feel like I’m doing a crappy job compared to so-and-so, but for the vast majority of the time….I don’t even notice what other people are up to. I just do what works for us and I don’t feel judged or critiqued in the slightest.

So maybe that’s the secret? Just enter your own little Mommy-world-bubble and don’t worry about other people. 99% of the time, they’re not worrying about you either. And if it’s that 1% of the time when someone is truly judging you??? – who cares? Life’s too short. Like the quote above says – “You’re a good mom.” : )

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