Disclaimer: This is a TMI (too much information) post alert! I talk about boobs, booby-milk, and periods! If that’s not your cup of tea, just skip this post entirely!

Well, it’s happened.

Somehow time has moved on and, suddenly, I’ve got a couple 6 month olds!

You may recall that 6 months was my “goal” time for breastfeeding. There are some good things and some bad things about coming to an end of our breastfeeding experiences.

First the Good:

  • I’m beyond excited to sleep on my stomach again. It hurt – and is not recommended – when breastfeeding, and I couldn’t all pregnancy, so it’s been over a year!!! Sleeping face-down is my preferred sleep-position, so I’m thrilled to sleep on my stomach again!
  • Can’t wait to wear regular bras again! I’m pretty curious what my “new” size is! I’ll have to go to Victorias Secret and get resized and buy some pretty new things sometime soon.
  • Not having to wear nursing pads is going to be the best thing ever!
  • Can’t wait to *really* get back to exercising! I’ve been running about 2-3 days a week, but that’s been about it. Exercise can be complicated when you breast feed. You have to worry about leakage, timing of pumping/feeding, and general discomfort of bouncing or full breasts when doing lots of exercises. I won’t bore you with the logistics, but it’s not easy. And I’ve really, really been craving getting some serious exercise back in my life!
  • Being able to put the pump away!!!! YAY!!! Can’t wait!!!
  • My hands-down favorite thing is the amount of time I’ll be saving!!! I have hated being constantly attached to the pump and having to plan my entire life around the pumping schedule. It’s been tough pumping at work/school, and I can’t even explain the inconvenience it has been. I hated every second of it. I did it because, obviously, it was well worth it (in my humble opinion) to give the breast milk benefits to my preemie twins. But I also hated it. A lot.

The Bad:

  • I’ll miss the close contact with my babies while breastfeeding.
  • Relatedly, there’s nothing like a boob to soothe a screaming baby. Instant satisfaction! I’ll miss having the ability to stop a meltdown in a flash (pun intended!)
  • I will NOT enjoy resuming my monthly cycle. Remember when I had that random bleeding and thought it was the return of my monthly visitor? Turns out, it was not so! I haven’t experienced any more *ahem* “cycling” since that time. It’s been pretty nice! But once I stop breastfeeding its only a matter of time until the beast returns! (And I hear the cramps make up for the year + without a cycle!)
  • I hate that the timing worked out so we’ll be stopping breastfeeding right during flu and RSV season.
  • Worst of all, I feel like we just barely got into the “groove” of breastfeeding! It took us over 5 months (literally probably just 2 weeks ago) until I felt like we really “got” it. Everyone kept saying it gets easier and somehow it never did. It was always a daily struggle. But somehow, very recently, things just kind of “clicked” and the girls got it. They didn’t fight it; they became more efficient (read: it no longer took 45 minutes. Closer to only 15); they could get an entire meal from it (rather than bf + bottle feeding + pumping afterwords).

I don’t know why breastfeeding was so hard for us. Probably a combination of many issues. But for whatever reason it took us nearly 6 months for the babies to really get a hang of the whole breastfeeding process. And now its ending. *tear*

So where are we now?

At this point I’ve stopped pumping all together. I continue to breastfeed the babies twice a day (generally one in the morning and one at night), but I know my supply has already greatly reduced and its only a matter of time until its gone.

Part of me was hoping I’d reach 6 months and decide to continue breastfeeding. And although I’ll probably continue the morning + night routine as long as I can (until the milk runs dry), I’m not continuing with the whole regimen of taking lots of vitamins, pumping, etc. Starting in January I’m teaching a class that runs for 4 hours two days per week. Taking into consideration drive time, etc., it would probably be a minimum of 5 hours between pumps. That’s longer than I’d ever go when I was doing the pumping thing. And the thought of trying to maintain it all was making my head spin. It’s just not really feasible anymore.  (Side note: KUDOS to full-time working Moms who pump! I don’t know how you do it! It has been SUCH a struggle for me and I only go into the office about twice a week!!!)

I am glad that I’ve built up a stash of some frozen breast milk so I can continue to give a bit of breast milk immunity benefits during this cold/flu season! I have been blessed to receive donated breast milk from a friend and have also been able to freeze some of my own (from before I stopped pumping). I plan to continue to slowly supplement the formula with some of the Momma-milk until the freezer stash is gone.

So that’s it. No more breast milk talk – I swear! It really feels like the end of an era and I have mixed feelings about the whole thing but, overall, I’m proud of myself for how long I lasted and I’m looking forward to a future that doesn’t revolve around my chest!